Schizophrenia Recovery: a process with hope.

This story is from: "Reasons For Hope", the Manitoba Schizophrenia Society Newsletter, Vol. 19, #1, 2007.

Tammy Lambert is an amazing and resilient person who is recovering from her experience with schizo-affective disorder. She was recently interviewed by Chris Summerville, Executive Director of MSS.

Here is her story:

1. Tell us a little about yourself and your family?

I have lived in Winnipeg, Manitoba for all of my life and I have an awesome, supportive family who means the world to me. They have been my supports throughout my painful experiences. I would not be at this point in my recovery without them. I feel very blessed. I have also been blessed with true and genuine friends. Through our struggles we understand and are there for one another.We know what it is like to suffer in life and therefore can relate to each other. I am 24 years old and already I feel I have learned numerous life lessons. Due to my experience with mental illness I feel I now have a good grasp of what is important in life and I feel I have turned my negative experiences around to help others who suffer like I have.

2. What has been your experience with mental illness?

That is quite the question. I have been living with a mental illness for about 10 years now. My current diagnosis is schizoaffective. I cope with both bipolar and schizophrenia symptoms. The bipolar symptoms refer to major fluctuations in mood (highs and lows). In my case I am a rapid cycler. My moods are for the most part under control now but when my symptoms were more intense, I experienced both extreme highs and lows changing within hours. I’d feel extremely high and elated and then shortly after I’d feel low and would often cope by resorting to negative behaviors such as overdosing or scratching (behaviors I have not engaged in for over 4 years now). I also experience schizophrenia symptoms such as paranoia and other delusions.To this day I cope with these symptoms, ranging in a spectrum of intensity. Some days my symptoms are more intense then others, often depending on the amount of stress I am experiencing. Stress seems to be a major factor in determining how intense my symptoms are. Therefore I work hard at trying to live a balanced life. I believe that although I still experience symptoms I am still on the road to recovery and in the stage of empowerment. I am living my life the best I can with what I have been given (it is the journey and not the destination).

3. What was it like to be hospitalized?

Hospitalizations were very bitter/sweet experiences for me. I experienced a lot of pain during hospitalizations. I was struggling to understand what was happening to my mind.The illness at times was extremely out of control. Yet hospitals kept me safe and sheltered during the intense turmoil and chaos I was experiencing. I have been hospitalized many, many times over the past 10 years. In the beginning I lost my friends because of my illness, for the most part because they didn’t understand as there was little awareness at that time. Also, I was making poor choices in how I reacted to the illness and for a while shut my own family out of my life in that regard. I felt that I could just be myself in the hospital and be accepted for who I was. I could relate to other people there who were going through the same thing I was.

One of the definite positive things about the hospital was that it provided necessary tools to focus on coping with a mental illness. I learned numerous skills through the hospital (and Manitoba Adolescent Treatment Center as well where I lived off and on through the ages 15-18). Now I resort more to outside resources that provide help such as the Manitoba Schizophrenia Society. I feel that they provide necessary resources that help people cope without resorting to hospitalization.They are more recovery oriented. I also am involved with Sara Riel. They have been a major support and influence in my recovery journey, and I have met true friends through Sara Riel. I found that you don’t need to be in the hospital to find people that understand. As well there are necessary outlets in the community to receive recovery and other coping information and skills.

4. What do you think about the concept of “recovery” and what does it mean to you personally?

Recovery to me means that you are living the best life possible with meaning and purpose no matter whatever obstacle you have been given. In my case, I feel I am on the “road to recovery” despite the fact that I still experience symptoms (even sometimes on a daily basis). I have learned to respond to symptoms of my illness rather then react to them. It’s important to be recovery-oriented and not focus so much on the symptoms of the illness. Medication is only a very small part of recovery. In order for recovery to take place the mind, body and soul must be addressed.

5. What has helped you in your recovery journey?

Many, many things have helped me on my recovery journey. As I mentioned, a holistic approach (taking care of mind, body, and soul) is necessary. I do my best to be as healthy as possible in all of these areas. I keep my mind active with stimulation from university courses and I do take some form of meditation throughout the day. I also find journaling very therapeutic. For my body I exercise on a regular basis; I try to eat as healthy as possible; I see a chiropractor regularly; I take my medication consistently and I am also on numerous herbs, vitamins, and minerals. In regards to my soul, I pray. I don’t believe that church is necessary to experience God, although I attend church when I can. Church helps me put the Bible into context and perspective (I can’t read the bible by myself because of some of the delusions I experience). Supports,including family, friends, and others have also been extremely important to me on my recovery journey. I would not be where I am today without them.

6. What has hindered your recovery process?

I believe that the major factor that hindered my recovery process was my negative attitude. After I developed a more positive perspective my whole life changed. Another thing that was an obstacle to my recovery was my focus. I used to focus primarily on the symptoms and illness, but now I try to be more pro-active (more recovery-oriented). It’s amazing what a positive attitude and recovery focus can do.

7. I’ve seen the amazing recovery material and workbook you have written for yourself. Can you share with our readers what that is all about?

Sure. My book is based on my experiences with mental illness. It includes five parts, of which three are complete. There is autobiography part, a journal entry part, a poetry part, a coping mind, body, and soul part and lastly, an inspirational part. I basically compiled 10 years worth of journal entries, poems, etc. to put the book together. I hope through relating to other people’s experiences with mental illness that my book will one day have an impact on and touch people’s lives. Writing this book has been a major catalyst in my own recovery journey.

8. If you were speaking to someone who was just told that he or she has schizophrenia, what words of encouragement would you give him or her?

I would tell them not to give up hope and that it is still possible to attain all the goals and dreams they had prior to becoming ill. I would tell them about all the supports that are available to them. I would share with them some of my experiences and how I felt when I first got sick and what has helped me in my own recovery journey.

9. What role do you see family members playing in the recovery process?

I see the family as playing a crucial role in the recovery process. First of all in order for the family to play a role in their family member’s recovery journey they must be educated themselves. Lack of understanding about the illness and the recovery process is a great barrier. With the family being more knowledgeable they can provide more love and support for the struggling individual.This love and support will therefore have a positive affect on the individual and their recovery. We have to keep in mind though that families cannot be the only available support. This will cause burnout and this is not fair to either the individual or the family. I believe that both family and outside supports are necessary.

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The second mental health success story is from Phil Penner, our son, and his evolution to mental health mangement success occurred at the Eden Mental Health Centre, 1500 Pembina Avenue, Winkler, Manitoba, and its outreach programs.

Phil's Recovery Outline -

A Patient's Perspective on Five Keys to Recovery at Segue:

1. Keep moving. I found that after hours sitting in bed thinking about high-level issues, the low-level repetitive motion of a factory setting helped me to re-integrate into the employment market. Since then, riding bike has helped me to reduce coffeee drinking and improve my heart health. Biomechanics has helped improve my ability to think clear-headedly. Rudimentary activity developed the ability to work while I think.

2. Keep Interacting.

At Trainex there was both greater opportunity to mingle with people, and interact with computers. I found the introduction of a computer as a substitute care-giver especially important to getting over what the doctor referred to as poverty of thought. The computer was able to stimulate without over-whelming me.

3. Reciprocate.

Trainex had introduced health-care which was less economically one-sided. In other words, instead of people telling me about the hundreds of dollars it costs a night to put someone in a private room on the top floor of Victoria hospital looking down on the university, they provided work which was beneficial to Trainex as well as to the patient. so the concept of being able to reciprocate had been very important in negotiating my health. This helped to create health- care team synergy, and sponsorship. Being able to do something created a sense of worth.

4. Plan a method of care.

The final key to the benefit of Trainex was: That we were able to discuss what had appeared to be the root issues, and work at a plan of entering the job market in a way that would grow healthily on a specific field of care.

Cleaning has been a basis for renewed relationships, and in some respects I can see it growing into a higher calling. This is a method of personal management of care on a broader basis. Cleaning has created an on-going remedy for my situation.

We all need our method of chipping away at health care in order to create a path to recovery. Mine is to scrap- book the crisis, and time-capsule the missions.

Segue helped to reach agreement between myself and the community on what my core commiment to health had been. This agreement had helped with the environmental psychology problem that I had previously faced.

5. Create a sustainable micro-financial lifestyle.

The American Baptist church defines financial peace as debt free living, with sufficient insurance. With that goal in mind, a pace of debt reduction had been established. The public trustee had re-organized my insurance focus from life insurance to property insurance. My family encouraged a legal expense insurance policy as well.

At this time, all official written debt has been paid.

For the schizophrenic, income sources look something like the hybrid business model. There is a combination of active income (my job), passive income (my investments), and recreational income (hobby production of soap, multi-level marketing of health products and legal services, flea market income, and christmas party lottery). All these sources of income help to micro-green a person's finances.

GOOD LUCK RECOVERING,

phil penner